Safety First Adventurer Gifts

'Something's come up that isn't covered in the security guard's handbook.'

A skier keeps a parachute for a steep slope.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

Reasonableman

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

The Dangers of Not Getting Enough Sleep...

'We don't want to risk having any injuries during spring training.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

First aid departments

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

"Pity that 'on' button's a bit of a stretch."

'In the few remaining minutes of the lesson I can't do better than to show you how to fill an accident form.'

'I know just how you feel.'

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."

'Quick! Contact my doctor!'

'While I'm here, Doctor . . .'

Contagious Diseases.

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

'Never shoot straight up.'

Dept of Health and Safety founder was accident victim.

'He swallowed a warning label!'

'I'd like to play, but I'm afraid it might void my warranty.'

"Now just hold on a minute, fellers. This thing doesn't look to be very safe at all."

'Never thought I'd see you again - you really must have nine lives.'

I just don't trust those self-flying brooms yet.

Barber has strapped boy in barber chair with a safety belt.

'Next time you lose your keys, please call a locksmith instead of blowtorching the door.'

"If we hire you, Sanders, you'll find that when it comes to security, we don't fool around."

'I'm on beach-patrol today: It's sunscreen in there...'

"...this one has even a little emergency phone to ring the hospital if you cut yourself."