Safety Drill Guru Gifts

I specifically told you to keep it simple --- To not go overboard with the lifeboat drill!

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"I see you've security marked your property."

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

AI Safety Officer

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

'Oops! Sorry! I should've said, 'buckle your seat belts'!'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'Let's try it once without the parachute.'

"The sky looks blue because your protective lenses are tinted, dear."

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

Job Safety - Hardhat.

The Hive, Inc. Think safety! 17 days without a honey boo-boo.

Nice park. . .

Atlas carrying Earth about to slip on banana peel.

"He says: If they're smart enough to hire a top lawyer and sue us for having wet floors then they're smart enough to look where they're *%&$* going..."

Beware of Everything

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

Safest Airline in The World

To prevent geese from flying toward its planes, Jupiter Airlines made some key design changes,

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

"Trust me, with me in charge, your kid will behave and be safe..."

Hurricane damage to trees

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

The Future of Flight?

"Aaaughhh! Don't play with that!"

'I'm here in case one of the actors actually does break a leg.'

'It's an old work injury.'