Safety Gear Guru Gifts

'Next time Fred tries to go Zero to sixty in two seconds he'll wear a few more clothes.'

Eat lunch with the hardhats.

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

On the brink.

Baby on board.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

"I see you've security marked your property."

Cricket Accidents.

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

AI Safety Officer

'I tell you what: If it weren't for the headrest, I would have serious whiplash right now...'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'Oops! Sorry! I should've said, 'buckle your seat belts'!'

'Let's try it once without the parachute.'

Caution signs.

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

"The sky looks blue because your protective lenses are tinted, dear."

Mother hen driving with 'Eggs on Board' sign.

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

Job Safety - Hardhat.