Safety Gurus Gifts

"Try standing on the top step."

Clean Dancing.

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

Sometimes it's not good enough to look both ways.

'Next time you barbeque, Ms. Godiva, I strongly advise you to wear clothes.'

'Whenever things fall into place, it's usually on top of me.'

"Yes you successfully removed the trip hazard, but with hindsight..."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Baby on board.

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

On the brink.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

"I see you've security marked your property."

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Sitting Up'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

A Crash-test Dummy child about to have a ride on a car crash test ride in a shopping centre mall.

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

AI Safety Officer

'Oops! Sorry! I should've said, 'buckle your seat belts'!'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'Let's try it once without the parachute.'

Job Safety - Pumpkin.