Safari Goer Gifts

"I don't get it."

Lion: dark meat or light?

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

Will Kill For Food

"Well, the wildebeest migration is scheduled to cross the river here next week: why don't you invite your friends and have a party then?"

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

"I feel lousy...I think someone I ate disagree with me."

"Forget it, he's got a brain the size of a walnut: No point reasoning with him to let us cross..."

Lyle didn't know that since their last encounter the rhino had gotten glasses.

The Z Chromosome: Zebratic engineering with questionable results.

Sorry Lot Full!

'Can I get you a drink first?'

"You're light on your feet for someone your size."

'I'd love to help you guys, but I've got it pretty good here. I protect them and they throw me their sick and occasionally the odd jerk they want rid of.'

'Careful man, he has poor eyesight, but a very keen sense of fashion.'

Marmalade the Cheetah and Vulture.

"Hang on, they're taunting us to charge: It must be a trap..."

"King of the jungle, huh?"

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

Romantic Giraffes

Vlad the Impala

"Look, a bug!"

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

"Eat me"

Feedback card for lions eating their prey.

'I don't know about you. But I'm eating my fill before I drag this carcass to the 'king of the beasts'.'

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

The Tiger Tank that came to Safari Tea.

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

"So, I've heard you call yourself 'King of the Jungle'! Based on what criteria exactly?"

"Come on in. The water’s fine!" "Hmm! What’s wrong with this picture?!"

Zoo animals.

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

'Oh boy, meals on wheels.'