Sado-masochism Gifts

Sado-masochists reading in bed.

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Gas: Regular/Hi-Test/Testosterone

'Interesting presentation Bradley, except you were supposed to be discussing the nature of the DOW.'

Important Muscles.

Sylvester Stallone

Soldiers' Ego

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

"Fill'er up with testosterone."

Alpha males through the ages!

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"This is all my own hair."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

Man with many tattoos.

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

"Clothes, hell. It's the desk that makes the man."

"Handsome isn't he? And I've heard he's the Head Bed Bug in a five-star hotel too..."

"Am I Yin and you're Yang, or is it the other way around?"

'I'm sorry, Ma'am, but medical science still has a lot to learn about machismo.'

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

Arm and leg wrestling.

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

Break-ins by the Masochist Society

'Well, that's just great, we're lost...but will Mr. Macho stop and ask for directions? Ohhh, no!'

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.

The Men Thing. . .

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

'We're gonna have lovely hangovers in the morning!'

Extreme sports psychologist.