Masochistic Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Extreme sports psychologist.

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

Faster, Georges, faster!

Do Not Resuscitate

Selling lemon latt�

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Speed Dating for Turtles

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Cariactures

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

'Cannonball!'

Here and There Trays

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'