Sex Humor Aficionado Gifts

'He just learned to count last week and last night he invented 69'

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Zombie standup

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"What's a patent?"

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Easter Island legs