Sacred Space Comedian Gifts

'Verger, give me a hand to move the font over a bit. . .'

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'You caught it, you gut it!'

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

Save Our Universe

'I don't know which was prettier - the meteor shower or the cascade of flaming space junk.'

'Gravity...Go figure!'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"I've heard that seeing the earth from outer space can really change your perspective. I couldn't agree more."

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

Water is discovered on the moon....

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

Science fiction fans on other planets

The Origins of Everything