Royal Family Gifts

Prince Harry

Royal Wedding and the Austerity Programme

Royal Wedding History

Queen Elizabeth

'Nicholas Witchell couldn't make it on the 8th.'

I knew you'd take Chuck's side

'Not till you're sixteen.'

'Need I remind you Harry, this is an official Public not Pubic engagement!'

'So much for intuition! You've knitted them all in the wrong colour!'

"Wake up, Gustav! Hey! Wake up!"

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Czarcasm

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

TV jester.

'The Burrito King.'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"She wishes to range free!"