Royal Family Enthusiast Gifts

Henry VIII tells Catherine of Aragon that he is about to divorce her.

'One can see the baby's crown!'

'If Daddy ever abdicated, you'd keep him on as a consultant, wouldn't you?'

'I understand that none of you have been patronizing Prince Billy's lemonade stand....'

'It's a Mexican Wave, not a 'ALL HAIL TO THE QUEEN' you egotistical tw@t!'

'Oh, I almost forgot -- commandeer some bread and milk on your way home.'

'Need I remind you Harry, this is an official Public not Pubic engagement!'

"What do you mean, Grandma granted you asylum?"

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'Now that's an afro!'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

"He's a guard dog."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

Czarcasm

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"She wishes to range free!"

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'