Royal Comedy Fans Pillows

'You got a message from Louis, but don't ask me which one- I can't keep them straight!'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

"Oh well, what does a jester know?"

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

Rowan Atkinson,

'What's the point of being king of the dogs if I still have to fetch his slippers?!'

'No, no, no - I said do me a ship in a bottle'

King reaching for an apple

'Yes Sir, we do believe 'the customer is king', but that doesn't give you the right to deduct a 'Peasant's Tax' from your bill!'

The Queen's Speech

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

"He's a Prince Charles Spaniel."

"It is not you. It is we."

Joke of a lover

'There must be some mistake -- Kings don't pay for things.'

LUDWIG REX, 'I don't like it - It makes me sound like a hairdresser!'

'They're not available right now, Sire - All your economic advisors are working second jobs.'

Palanquin Toilet Break

'Hey -- this guy says we can skip capitalism and go straight to state socialism!'

'First you drop hints - if that doesn't work, you drop bombs.'

'Don't be silly darling...I married you for your money, it makes no difference, pounds or euros.'

'We don't have the funds to build a huge statue of you, Sire - How would you feel about a bobble-head?'

'I'm tired of foreign policy -- I think I'll go interfere in the economy for awhile.'

"I don't care how comfortable it is - You look like an idiot!"

Prince Charles

'He doesn't reign so much as he drizzles.'

Snail Red Carpet