Routine Runner Gifts

Tick.

"We go on daily walks too, but my master is a creature of habit: we take exactly the same route every single time..."

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

"You keep impeccable time."

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

Women in a cross country race

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

"Here's your hourly job performance review."

'Think' 'But not too much'

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

Daily Routine

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

'Stress'

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

'When the poor dear retired, he found that he missed his little cubicle.'

"Bear with us, will you? -- We're having technical difficulties over here."

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

"I'd like to see you every Tuesday, forever."

Runner's High, Runner's Low

Loser's Podium.

'I was this close to the finish line and then somebody threw a stick!'

Alien abducts Olympic athlete.

'And this is where daddy goes through the motions.'

"It's definitely Friday. I'm looking at my calendar."

'Well, did you win or what?'

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

A number of runners run through police tape.

"You've become very predictable, Jack - home every night!"

'And now for the (Yawn!) morning report....'

"I do my best thinking in the shower... do I need to run 5 miles a day in order to take one?"

The Tortoise and the Herring. Triathlon. I always knew that I'd pass him after the swimming portion of the race.

Congratulations for male runner