Romantic Thrifty Gifts

Florist. You're taking your new girlfriend to the aviary for Valentine's Day? Yes -- It's a cheap date.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

Say it with flowers

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

The Bargain Brand

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

How much would you take off for cash?

'I'd be more impressed that you bought me flowers if you didn't take a job as a delivery boy to get the employee discount.'

"As company chairman I'd like to thank you all for participating in the evenings entertainment and saving me �4000."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

"C'mere, space heater."

'If the pound is worth so little, can I have a couple?'

'Sharing the petrol costs didn't bother me, but I resent having to pay half for the condoms!'

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Uh, Dad, I appreciate the 'walkin' around money,' but I need 'walkin' around New York City money.'"

"The portions here are so small, thank goodness there's a food bank around the corner."

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

You always wanted a cute leather jacket