Thrifty Gourmet Gifts

'With our low prices we can't afford a chef.'

"The portions here are so small, thank goodness there's a food bank around the corner."

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'Strained carrots again! What am I being punished for this time?'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'It's another cookery programme but It's aimed at children.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

Boy baking a cake.

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

The Bargain Brand

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

'Today the Yuan rose against the pork belly, the chicken beak, the eel, the wanton, and the egg noodle.'

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

How much would you take off for cash?

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

"C'mere, space heater."

'If the pound is worth so little, can I have a couple?'