Romantic Statisticians T-Shirts

'Let's get married,Miss Jones and have 2.8 kids!'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Carbon Dating.

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

"Now that was post-modern sex."

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"I know what you're thinking - all I am to you is a vector."

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

Romans.

Intellectual Foreplay...

'Look, I want you back, but I'm not going to beg.'

"The best place to make black hole discoveries is in the bedroom."

'First date with a logician - These venn Diagrams will save us a lot of time. We'll see where you fit in, where I fit in, and if any of it overlaps'

"This doesn't have anything to do with the falling price of oil, does it?"

Deconstructionist girlfriend

"We went dutch - he must have reached his two-hundred-dollar dating deductible."

"105% of the staff who completed 84% of the process were 95% sure that it was a 100% waste of time."

"The great thing about a science background is I can understand what you're experiencing in biochemical terms."

'And do you agree to share any downturn in the stock market with equanimity?'

"I've done the numbers, and I will marry you."

'You're in luck - My parents like you.'

"I see - Gravity keeps the Earth in orbit but love makes the world go 'round."

"You've lost what - your Mojo!"

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

A shared passion

'Oh, Denise. I wish we had met when community property laws were more in favor of men.'

"Is it just me? Or do I detect a certain chemistry between us?"

"...get in there and make my post docs fall in love with their research."

How scientists propose

Second dates are trickier. They ask the same questions as on the first date, looking for inconsistencies.