Romantic Statisticians Gifts

The Statistics of Love

'Let's get married,Miss Jones and have 2.8 kids!'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Carbon Dating.

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"I know what you're thinking - all I am to you is a vector."

"Now that was post-modern sex."

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

Romans.

Intellectual Foreplay...

'Look, I want you back, but I'm not going to beg.'

"The best place to make black hole discoveries is in the bedroom."

'First date with a logician - These venn Diagrams will save us a lot of time. We'll see where you fit in, where I fit in, and if any of it overlaps'

"This doesn't have anything to do with the falling price of oil, does it?"

Deconstructionist girlfriend

"We went dutch - he must have reached his two-hundred-dollar dating deductible."

'And do you agree to share any downturn in the stock market with equanimity?'

"The great thing about a science background is I can understand what you're experiencing in biochemical terms."

"105% of the staff who completed 84% of the process were 95% sure that it was a 100% waste of time."

"I've done the numbers, and I will marry you."

'You're in luck - My parents like you.'

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

"You've lost what - your Mojo!"

"I see - Gravity keeps the Earth in orbit but love makes the world go 'round."

"I like you and all, Carl, but you've just got too many problems."

A shared passion

'Oh, Denise. I wish we had met when community property laws were more in favor of men.'

"Is it just me? Or do I detect a certain chemistry between us?"

Bio Lab. The experiments indicate olfactory sensing of pheromones might play a role in romantic attraction. Love is blind but it has a great sense of smell!

"...get in there and make my post docs fall in love with their research."