Romantic Jokesters Gifts

'Of course it's a real diamond. You think I'd spend eighty bucks for a fake?'

'Yes, this is romantic, but that's not why I chose this. Gas prices are up, and i can't afford dinner, movie and gas for my car.'

"Freddie really loves me. He didn't just put a ring on my finger. He also banded my leg."

Clock Co. Billing an & Coo Coo Dept.

Increase Your Height.

'She says she'll go out with me if I can find a co-signer.'

'I'm from the computer dating agency.'

Consenting Adults.

Wind Tunnel of Love.

"My doctor gave me the O.K. to go ahead and die during sex."

'I'm not applauding your lovemaking, I'm trying to turn off the lights.'

"So yeah - This is my ideal first date."

"Maybe we'd kiss better if we had lips."

"So how about coming back to my place and I'll explain the Jewish dietary laws to you."

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

'Actually, I do mind wearing your pedometer!'

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

"I think it was good for me. Was it good for you?"

'They were all out of roses.'

"But you didn't say they had to make sense - you just told us to write a thousand words a day."

"What are you trying to tell me, girl? Are you hungry? You’re not hungry? The squirrels are skinny-dipping in the pool? Cats are making a hook rug out of your bed? You dug up Jimmy Hoffa?!" "Mitch liked messing with his dog's head."

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'