Jokesters In Love Gifts

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

Wind Tunnel of Love.

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"So yeah - This is my ideal first date."

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

Extremely Practical Jokes.

'Actually, I do mind wearing your pedometer!'

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

"Your therapy will be a combination of drugs and clowns."

'They were all out of roses.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

Consenting Adults.

"What are you trying to tell me, girl? Are you hungry? You’re not hungry? The squirrels are skinny-dipping in the pool? Cats are making a hook rug out of your bed? You dug up Jimmy Hoffa?!" "Mitch liked messing with his dog's head."

Student to math teacher: 'My dog ate my homework and got arithmetics.'

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

Man on desert island using elastic to shoot him off the island.