Romantic Gesture Skeptics Gifts

"I'd like your homemade birthday card a lot better if it weren't scribbled on a bar napkin."

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

Say it with flowers

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

'The ones with the teethmarks are the had centers.'

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

Rude Snowpeople

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

A man carries a huge bouquet of flowers.

Mexican Serenade.

"Just once, when you bring me a bouquet of flowers can you not pull it from your sleeve?!"

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

"I'd rather you'd said it with diamonds."

'I'm very impressed that you ordered the entire meal in French. Pity it's a Chinese restaurant...'

"So I gave her the 2-diamond love-and-BFFF ring and she grave me a big kiss, sold it, and went on a cruise. That's bad, right?!"

"You big softy! How did you know I'm tired of being fought over?"

"A cactus! Darling, you're such a romantic..."

"Say it with Pierogies"

'I want to mark this as our special place.'

"I believe in love at first sight. It saves a lot of time."

"I've finally found my soulmate."

"OK, what have you done?"

'Marry me!'

'...I can't believe you surprised me with a romantic balloon ride for our anniversary!'

'You remembered it's Valentine's Day!'

"The answer is NO!"

Missing you...

Bakery - say it with flour.

"We have box shapes for every commitment level."

"I’ll give you my answer in ... just ... one ... minute."

"Oh, Gary, they're beautiful!"