Romantic Gestures Gifts

'My foreplay isn't working anymore is it, Angela?'

Surgeon gives nurse heart, saying, Will you be my valentine?

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

"If music be the food of love, shut up."

"Say it with Pierogies"

Eddy made his proposal to Greta but he couldn't interpret her response. did she mean 'Yes', 'No' or just 'Moooh'?

'Thank-you for the flowers. I'll just pop them in a very small vase.'

'How much for NO stems?'

Happy anniversary! Not perfume again!

Christmas kiss

'The ones with the teethmarks are the had centers.'

'...I can't believe you surprised me with a romantic balloon ride for our anniversary!'

'Bridget my love... I swear to you, you're my first.'

Say it with flowers. Keep it quiet with flowers.

You know I can't do the twist.

'I know how you love empty boxes.'

"It's eau de pew, your favourite."

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

'Is that your wife's anniversary present?' - 'Yes, it's an annual report on our marriage.'

"Can we turn the lights off? I find the exaggerated facial expressions kill the mood."

"Fancy a s**g?"

Couple burning romance graffiti

"I've finally found my soulmate."

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

". . . And I tell you that Sir Walter Raleigh used his OWN coat."

"But how can I be sure you're smiling alluringly at me?"

"What? You want to be carried across the threshold or not?"

"I bought my wife a diamond planet"

Goat Romance

"I'd like an engagement ring that declares my uncompromising love...for under fifty bucks."

'I'm very impressed that you ordered the entire meal in French. Pity it's a Chinese restaurant...'

'This beeper goes off when it's my Birthday. This beeper goes off on the day we met. This beeper goes off on Valentine's Day...'

A simple demonstration with a box of chocolates - 'Oh, yeah! Work it, Peel. You the man.' - 'Ah! Perfect!' -

Do It.

"Oooh, my favourites. Forket me knots."