Romantic Advice Seeker Pillows

"If you have a boyfriend, I have some advice, young lady! Wisdom that's been handed down from generation to generation!"

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

"You've reached Randy the love doctor. What ails you?"

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

Sitting in a tree

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

Baker Romance

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

'I took your advice and told him either I get a raise or I quit!'

"Why so grim, handsome?"

"This could be the marriage all our other marriages were for!"

Constructive Criticism 50c.

How oysters get engaged.

"Look, you're the one who asked me for some girl advice."

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

Cupid and parachutists.

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'

"I've been invited to two different thanksgivings...One with family, one with friends, which one do I go to?"

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

"Wow! Check out the moon."

'Here's how you'll know for sure. Does he always get dreamy and say it, like 'I l-o-o-o-v-e you,' - or is it just a tossed-off, 'Love ya!?'

"You've reached Randy, the dating doctor. What ails you?"