Romantic Advisor Seeker Pillows

Try Mediation

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

Window Treatment

Sitting in a tree

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

Baker Romance

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

'It's been years since she sang my praises.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

"My computer just texted me."

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Hollywood Breakup

"Why so grim, handsome?"

"...and do you agree to accept him as he is, and not try to change him?"

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

"This could be the marriage all our other marriages were for!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"I didn't mean your day wasn't hard, too."

'I know a lot of wives let themselves go when they're married- but AFTER the reception?'

"Remind me - if I'm no longer a footballer, and you're no longer a celebrity. . . why are we here?"

Cupid and parachutists.

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'

"It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother."

'Edwards... Tamano... this isn't what I had in mind when I sent you two out on the company retreat.'

How oysters get engaged.