Roman Empire Lover Pillows

"Caius's and Livia's orgies never seem to get off the ground."

You're my Mona Lisa.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

Long before the GPS, traveling humans found their way around by using an Atlas.

Hadrian's Wall

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

The Fall of Gnome

Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.

I'm Spartacus.

'We met through a radiocarbon dating service.'

"I don't know what happened, your holiness! I painted the ENTIRE CEILING!"

'Mum, I don't care what these nasty kids say about my brothers Romulus and Remus being adopted: I love them all the same...'

"Galileo soon modified his gravity experiments" "Ready to catch it?"

'Honey, I'm Rome!'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

'Barbarians at the gate? That's fine, I fully support social mobility.'

Euro Problems

All Roads Lead To Rome

'Et tu Yakamoto?'

"Efficiency tombs available"

Francois Rabelais

"What was the Roman attitude to construction?"

Romulus (left) and Remus

Roman playing croquet under aqueducts.

'You never smile at me like that!'

Pull my finger.

'Actually, I find the destroying more satisfying than the nation-building.'

"Reviving the old all type, eh?"

"Your painted celing is ready, your holiness."

I arrived, I Ate, I Conquered (aka Pooped).

The de-friending of Julius Caesar

"At least the TV people are saying Alvin Bragg had to pass a rubix cube to indict me. That had to hurt."

Julius Caesar