Rock Whisperer Gifts

Sculptor with falling rocks sign.

'It's a comet . . . It's a big rock on your head.'

'It's a high pressure job but worth it.'

'Here, we've unearthed a layer of granite, a layer of calcite, and a layer of erudite.'

"They're all native to the region."

I carved this statue out of Scottish bedrock. Gneiss-ly done!

Easter Island Model

"My lucky rock didn't turn out to be so lucky. Maybe it's really a fortune-telling stone...and it's telling me...it's time for a yard sale."

Wolf Karaoke

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Turtle Hat

"Uh-Oh..."

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

Business cartoon showing sales declining so much that they bounce off the floor.

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

Business man sees himself as a shark

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."

Man rotates profit chart so it shows growth not loss.

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"We have reason to believe there may be some volatility in the fourth quarter."

"Trust me, come low tide everyone will want these seats."

"At first I was a bit worried about the comeback of wolves in Europe. But I must admit that they had adapted well to living together with humans!"

Sales tied in knots

"Wow, listen to that: "Do you have a pioneer spirit? Wolves needed for reintroduction into European National Parks"..."

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

'Unfortunately, we were a little off-target again this quarter.'

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

"Graphs are like EKGs, they show the health of a company."

"It's been a bit of a roller coaster year so far."

"Our sales have slumped so much, we now have a couch for them."

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."