Road To Employment Adventurer Gifts

"Under experience, your resume states "out of body." Please explain!"

'I have this fear of the real world...'

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

"We've developed a five year plan that includes ample provisions for another five year plan if this one doesn't work."

"What's your occupation?"

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

'You're hired. Go figure.'

'I hear you're looking for bounty hunters...'

"...and before that, I was an embryo."

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

Job hoppers.

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

'Refusing to fill in a psychometric test reveals a lot about you, Jones.'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

"A High-Pain Job? Yes, I believe we have that."

'I always said he was on the fast track.'

'I'd love to have whatever job you have left.'

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

Oxford Circus

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

'You were in commodities - cattle, stuff like that - so you must feel right at home here.'

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

'I wonder if I should add this to my resume.'