Road Safety Expert Gifts

Gas Pedal Sticking?

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

'I'm afraid we need someone with a little more backbone for this position.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'Are we nearly there yet?'

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Please Drove Carefully.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Touring Cyclist

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

'Your Grounded!'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

Computer Controlled Car

Bedroom Traffic Control

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

One Way - Yield

"Being a crossing guard for a squirrel is exhausting!"

Last Road Rage Therapist for 500 Miles

Attention: Speed Troughs

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

To prevent geese from flying toward its planes, Jupiter Airlines made some key design changes,

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

'Mom's always telling me to look both ways, don't talk to strangers, and change my passwords.'

Vehicles waiting at a crossing for a tradesman's spirit level to pass.

"It helps prevent side collisions."

Deer crossing the road on a Skidoo.

Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"