Automotive Safety Expert Gifts

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"Take me to your mechanic."

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

Knights Wing Mirrors.

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

Natural gas

'The new intelligent dummies aren't working out. They've figured out there's a break!'

a crash-test dummy is performing some affirmations before going to work

To prevent geese from flying toward its planes, Jupiter Airlines made some key design changes,

Gas Pedal Sticking?

"It helps prevent side collisions."

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

'I'm afraid we need someone with a little more backbone for this position.'

"I failed driver's ed....Apparently there's like this rule about rear-ending a police car!"

'See? If Mommy had been wearing her seatbelt that wouldn't have happened.'

"Right I've checked everything 6 times. Surely nothing can go wrong this time."

This place is crawling with backstabbers, but they don't worry me.

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

"The latest car safety data is in, and it's still really really bad to crash into things."

'Stop complaining. We can't afford a car with airbags.'

Where airbags should be.

Now do you see the point of regular electrical checks?

"You know what's about to happen and you still got in the car. But yet I'm called the dummy."

"I see your son has a summer job."

'No, it only has a driver-side airbag.'

Man with Air Bag,"Did you know the earth spins at 1038 mph?"

'His airbag must have over inflated.'

"I don't think the new guy is built for this kind of work, do you?"

"You're going on a very short journey."

Seat belts - The giving of life.

'I don't care what planet he's from, Ma'am, he's gotta be in a car seat.'