Right Reverend Gifts

Night-time halo

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Priest's 'To do' list.

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

God Sneezes Out Creation

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

Golfing Bishop.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"All we have left is standing room only."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

At the 2021 Religious Games

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

The Current Separation of Church and State Explained.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'I've got two tickets to Handel's Messiah -- What time do you get off work?'

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

Priest

Cleric with bible briefcase.

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

'Can we sit in the balcony today? Huh? Can we?'

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."

Welsh airport arrivals.

Ten Commandments

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'