Rifle Ranger Gifts

Soldiers climb into bed.

New Guy.

Bear Hugging Season Open

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

'No JAMIE,you're NOT keeping any strays! Now GET rid of him and go wash up for dinner!...' / 'Sorry kiddo,i tried...'

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

'May the forest be with you.'

That's actually the gorilla survival manoeuvre. . .

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

"Daisy, that fall broke my leg pretty badly. You need to go get help, girl - oh, what a big stretch! Who’s a good stretcher? Daisy’s a good stretcher! What a good girl…"

Camping with Mr. Thorough

Hadley finds proof that bears actually don't s**t in the woods.

'Break glass in case of tangled antlers.'

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

'Do you have your insurance information on you?'

A Rifle Competition in the North

"Of course no one wants a forest fire anywhere, anytime. It can be devastating. That's why I feel so guilty."

The Destruction of the Environment

(Maps to the Homes of the Steers) (Maps $ 100)

"Feeling that only you can prevent forest fires could be construed as delusions of grandeur."

Wolf Reintroduction.

'Look, it's quite simple. It isn't rocket science you know... Er... Well, you know what I mean.'

Stephen Harpers's China Diary - Great Wall Tour.

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

'Hybrid technology does make me feel safer.'

'I'm sorry, miss. We are planting a forest here, so you'll have to move.'

Forest rangers prevent forest fires

Man sees half-eaten 'Do Not Feed the Bears' sign

A hunter hitting his first bird.

Ranger has sign saying 'Do not feed the bears'. Bear crosses out sign to read 'Feed the bears'.

'I fell out of my treestand but fortunately nothing got hurt.'

Sadly, the few who actually checked their e-mail, were too out of shape to run.

'Oh - It's you.'

Forest Management