Retro Tv Fans Gifts

'Greetings earthling! - Oh no, not in the middle of 'Oprah'!'

'Apparently, the government thought this would be more fun than just issuing regular identity cards.'

'Tonight's news is so depressing, we've decided just to show the 'Three Stooges' instead....'

'Can't you take a magazine like everybody else?'

'Due to an anomaly in the space-time continuum, we now bring you 'The Colgate Comedy Hour'....'

Bob had the misfortune of being haunted by the Three Stooges.

"These are PC to view, providing we laugh in an ironic and non-committal way - belly laughing constitutes a hate crime."

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

Before the Internet

Men: Hating chick flicks since 1623.

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

'Hey...remember T.V.?

"That concludes our broadcast day. Go to bed."

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

The Old Time Television Channel

Drive in movies.

'No Bonanza, no Gunsmoke, no Led Zeppelin... what a sad state of affairs this is! I'm glad I'm not in your generation...'

'Could you pass me my - oh thankyou.'

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"...Looks like nothing but snow on TV tonight..."

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!" "I want to go back to work." "But my son is still so young. I'd have to send him to preschool or day care. And then most of my salary would go to pay for that. So what should I do?" "You should do what we did in my day: Have six more kids and then let them all fend for themselves!" "If your eldest isn't a strong leader, it may get a little 'Lord of the Flies'-ish, but that builds character!" "...in the survivors."

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

'Well, kids -- I guess it all started to fall apart when they canceled 'Seinfeld'....'

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

Huawei Five-O

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

The Bronze Age of Television

'When I was your age, 'classic episodes' were called repeats.'

When I was a kid watching "Perry Mason" on tv, I always knew that when I grew up I'd spend a lot of time in courtroom. The only part I had wrong was that I always assumed I would be the defendant. ! !

"...but after they hired Vanna White instead of me things really got interesting."