Retro Entertainment Fans Gifts

Puppet hitting child with noisy phone

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Before the Internet

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

Men: Hating chick flicks since 1623.

'Hey...remember T.V.?

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

Drive in movies.

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

'No Bonanza, no Gunsmoke, no Led Zeppelin... what a sad state of affairs this is! I'm glad I'm not in your generation...'

'Could you pass me my - oh thankyou.'

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

Shirley Temple...The later years.. - 'Animal crackers in my poop...'

"Grandma's TV is so old it wasn't made in a foreign country."

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!" "I want to go back to work." "But my son is still so young. I'd have to send him to preschool or day care. And then most of my salary would go to pay for that. So what should I do?" "You should do what we did in my day: Have six more kids and then let them all fend for themselves!" "If your eldest isn't a strong leader, it may get a little 'Lord of the Flies'-ish, but that builds character!" "...in the survivors."

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

'Business was slow, slower than a fat tortoise with a limp. The phone hadn't rung for so long I thought it must be out of order. The new competition was good, very good. Who was this 'Google' guy?'

'It's Jones Sir! He's showing of his ball point pen again!'

DVD Video Rental. I rented "Shampoo" and "Private Benjamin". Neat .. A couple of olden Goldies.

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'Sir Steve Austin is here to see you.'

"Don't let the Leave It To Beaver lunchbox fool you...that new manager is TOUGH!"

"Who the hell didn't rewind Jumanji 20 years ago?!?"

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

'Sir, we're just not reaching them. Only a small percentage of people own vinyl records, and hardly anyone thinks to play them backwards.'

Waiter, what's this photograph of Jeff Goldblum doing in my soup? He starred in the remake of "The Fly." Personally, I prefer Al (David) Hedison in the original.

"Honey, check it out! It’s Thelma and Louise."

'What did your grandmother and I do before we had 600 channels? Go ask your 12 aunts and uncles.'

"...but after they hired Vanna White instead of me things really got interesting."

"These are PC to view, providing we laugh in an ironic and non-committal way - belly laughing constitutes a hate crime."

When I was a kid watching "Perry Mason" on tv, I always knew that when I grew up I'd spend a lot of time in courtroom. The only part I had wrong was that I always assumed I would be the defendant. ! !

'Morcambe and Wise.'

'What do you mean you're not drunk? That's the calculator!'