Retro Tale Lover Gifts

"In my day, we didn't ask for a raise, we demanded one!"

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"10th Anniversary Woodstock Reunion'

Mary Tyler Moore: Spot the Difference

Fossil record player.

Colonial Larrysburg.

"This woman's lib is getting beyond a joke!"

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

Alice in Wonderland - The Pig Baby.

"Me Tarzan. You CGI."

"All this online learning sort of makes you miss the head lice days, huh?"

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

Groovy Baby

William Tell

Young Elvis

"I think you're suffering from nostalgia, Mr. Prentice."

Old Book Smell

Welcome to a parallel universe. It's like 50 years ago, man. Coffee costs a quarter, tie-dye is groovy, there is a draft. Lots of differences: Free love, man. Corporations are evil. And some similarities. Joy is a new 8-track player. Shut yer #@$% yapper!

“Hold on—wait until those people are out of the way.”

"You must be patient, Mrs. Wast fall. Rome wasn't built in a day, you know."

"Yes, we do fix phones. But, what is that?"

"Expedition log #57: Like the rest of the week, I expect today will be another uneventful day."

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

Too young for the sixties, too squeamish for the seventies, too unambitious for the eighties, too technophobic for the 90s, too poor for the '00s, too old for the 'teens."

"It's a sad state of affairs when Lever House begins to seem like a warm old friend."

In the eighties, Americans knew how to be Americans. Big cars. Big radios. Big hair. Everything was big. Unfortunately, I was so buff that all my huge stuff looked tiny in comparison. So I would loan my stuff to the skinniest, wimpiest kid I could find. Hold this. Let me reminisce vicariously through you. (Sigh.) Those were the days. Is it working?

Hippie Edibles Co.

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

"The record player is skipping again."

"I love blue Martinis. It's like the fifties and the nineties all mixed up together."

'I miss the great depression.'

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'