Retirement Philosophers T-Shirts

'I'm just saying, if our income is 'fixed', how come we're 'broke'?'

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

"I'm so sorry that I screamed...I had a terrible dream: the kids had to leave college and live with us again...Oh, Ed, it was horrible!"

"Birth, bed, bath, beer, bankruptcy, bifocals, balding and beyond."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

Balding Autumn Tree.

Mall of ages

'You'll have to decide - do you want to be top management in a small pond, or bottom management in a big pond?'

"It's a coming of old age story."

"Seventy-five isn't the new anything."

There's got to be more to life than just sitting at a desk...

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

'I started out as one of the good guys but I hated it.'

"Since you retired, you've gone to pieces!"

'Well, you know what the say...near death is the new 80.'

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

"Leaving parties aren't as much fun since they put up the retirement age!"

"Oh yeah? Well, your dad makes more, but my dad's not stuck in a high-paying job he hates but is too scared to leave."

Glass/Cans/Geriatrics.

'One of life's great mysteries...Why does it take four week's salary to pay for two week's holiday?.'

"Maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for you."

"Relax, at your age it's perfectly natural to make groaning noises every time you move a body part."

"The senior moments don't freak me out as much as the 'Death in Venice' moments."

"Mom wasn't impressed with my suggestion that we 'agree to disagree'."

'Bloody warmongers!'

"Apparently, 60 is the new dead."

A long way towards retirement...

'It is our hope that the salary this job offers will take your mind off it's meaninglessness.'

'We can't offer you the satisfaction of a gratifying career, but how does a paid week off and dental sound?'

'Edward turned on the bathroom light only to find his father staring back at him.'