Retirement Philosopher T-Shirts

The Man of Steel (in retirement) hovering over the ladies' bathhouse at the sand n' surf in Boca Raton

"You've been swell and I hold you in the highest regard but you are definitely my last dog."

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

"Since you retired, you've gone to pieces!"

"at my age I have to wonder if it's indigestion or a heart attack." (two old men discussing aging and medical concerns)

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

Midlife: You Are Here.

"Birth, bed, bath, beer, bankruptcy, bifocals, balding and beyond."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Mall of ages

"It's a coming of old age story."

Balding Autumn Tree.

"Seventy-five isn't the new anything."

'You're lucky you're just a kid and don't have to worry about things like going out and getting a job when you're supposed to be retired.'

Phil at Fifty: Still Trying to Find Himself

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

'Well, you know what the say...near death is the new 80.'

Glass/Cans/Geriatrics.

"Apparently, 60 is the new dead."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe'."

"The senior moments don't freak me out as much as the 'Death in Venice' moments."

"Maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for you."

"What's wrong with your dad?"

"Relax, at your age it's perfectly natural to make groaning noises every time you move a body part."

"You've hit the age where your broad mind and narrow waist are turning into your narrow mind and broad waist."

'Our retirement plan is state funded. When you retire, we give you a lottery ticket.'

It's the dinner I didn't make. It's kind of a Zen Thing

'Bloody warmongers!'

"Sometimes, on a day like this, I can just catch the faintest smell of youth."

Evolution of Chair