Retirement On The Coast Gifts

Holidaymakers Share Wine With Neptune

The experienced backpacker.

Tourists

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

World Tour.

'It's 'baa baa' here and 'baa baa' there, until I'm just about nuts.'

Mrs Howell packs 200 changes of clothing for a 3-hour tour.

The Hall Of Mirrors Jeretski Palace, Plovdo

Why Do Old Hippies Smile?

Statue is moved to hold up the leaning tower of Pisa.

'That may be what the wine glossary says, but to me, terroir means a fantatic view.'

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check-in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.

"Ticket and passport, please."

Tourist

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

'We must have everything... this is all that's left!'

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

'Our goal is for you to successfully transition to your new job before retirement age.'

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

'The view is much better on the other side of the bus, we'll sit there on the way back.'

"The nest may be empty, but our drinks are full."

"They've swapped the pub for staying in and taking their meds."

How Relaxing It Is To Go To The Beach. . . How Close You Live To The Beach.

"I've passed your complaints along to the captain."

'Two for French Polynesia.'

"That's where the tenured faculty members hang out."

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

All Roads Lead To Rome