Retail Business Gifts

Mom & Pop General Store - Going Out of Business Slowly But Surely

"I may have gone disco, Mrs. Mullins, but that doesn't mean my meats are no longer choice lean cuts competitively priced for today's cost-conscious consumer."

Wine merchant convincing his customer that he has an extensive cellar

Larry's used art

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

Cut Price

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

"Home depot."

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

A women in a shoeshop.

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Wolf trying on sheep's clothing at a retail store.

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

"How was work?"

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

'Rozlyn, that blouse is very cute! I think you should get it.'

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

How Amazon was invented

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"See what I mean? It's going to take a bigger diamond."

"It's black, but it's not New York black."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

'I'm looking for something to impress the shareholders.'