Restorationist Gifts

"I told you she'd had some work done."

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

'It was restored just last year, and changed from an abstract painting to a landscape.'

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Fumes from furniture

"The keep saying unrestored and what a nice PATINA, Ted. A better-sounding word for old tarnished stuff would be SCRINCH or SKRITCH, don't you think, eh, Ted?"

'Great to see the ol' museum is finally getting a face-lift.' An old building getting a medical face-lift

"Gunther's years ahead of his time."

Inventor of the Tudor spirit-level

"He's a hunter-gatherer-tinkerer-fixer-upper-restorer-reseller."

Authentic Rinkelmier chair (Built 1723)

“It’s a pre-war building, but you’ll see they’ve kept most of the details.”

Emeril John Lagassé III caricature

'They did a great job in restoring all the 19th century details, but this confounded dress code...'

Under New Mismanagement

Cleaner cleaning up the paintings in a gallery.

Museum. It's great we got this job moving statues here at the museum. CRASH! That was no time to make a joke about a "piece of art."

You were warned about mixed marriages!

"I've up cycled your Chippendale!"

Dexter Flynn, Taxidermy Attorney.

Restored antique carriage in A.D. 2500

"Doesn't it worry you being such a philistine?"

"I investigated your husband, Mrs Adams. He isn't cheating on you. In fact, I'm your husband. We've just really lost touch recently."

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

Salvage Hunters

Leaning Tower of Pisa

Japan-Reconstruction

"We had an expert restore all the original shag carpeting."

"It's just a hunch, but you may have the power set too high on your pressure washer."

Painting Mona Lisa.

The Death of Chatterton - After Restoration