Restaurateur In Training Gifts

'Waiter there's a bug in my salad.'

"Even the waiters here are organic."

'Your French dip, sir.'

Diner.

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

"This is our soft opening."

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

'There's something hauntingly familiar about the bouquet.'

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

American style Greek cafe.

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

The Best Little Steak House in the City.

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"