Restaurant Escapade Fan T-Shirts

'I'll have the dessert list and he'll have the Heimlich maneuver.'

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

'A cheeky red?'

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

I love Cannelloni

"Shall I let them breathe."

Restaurant. One thing you can still get for a single dollar is the waiter's opinion of you.

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

'Shortly you will be running for your life. I wouldn't order dessert.'

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"...And would sir care to kill the rabbit himself?"

'Your pizza will be out in a few minutes. Tony's looking for a ladder to get it off the ceiling.'

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'Why, yes, I remember you. May I suggest an undrinkable pinot grigio that goes well with a bad tip?'

'Physical or Social Science?'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

"I realize your steak was tough but you didn't have to make such a stink about it."

'How would you like that? Medium, rare, or wrapped in plastic on a foam tray?'

"A table in Siberia, please."

'You want to see a list of ingredients? -- Are you trying to make trouble?'

"While the chef's dishes tonight are rather bland, his ideas are fresh and appealing."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

"Your fish ... I'm sorry, but there will be a slight delay."

"Can we get some more bread crumbs please?"

At the Lobster Mill, every night is an open casket.

"Yes I know I ordered fresh crab but..."

"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."

'Oh boy, my favourite: Cheese Fondue...'

Great, the skeletons of all the other cartoon characters who were here before us.

"At ease!"

'Shall I bring two children's meals, or will Madam regurgitate her own?'