Reptiles Gifts

Think positive.

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

'Are you alright? You seem tense...'

'Whoa I never said I had ED. I said I had reptile dysfunction.'

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

Rattlesnakes telling a snake holding a rattle - "For the last time. No!"

Steve Irwin.

A Cobra with prosthetic fangs.

'It looks like reptile dysfunction'

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

Snake, typing letter.

'Oh, you guys!'

'Any wriggle room?'

'And I think you'll be very impressed with the new network security system we just installed!'

'Let's use another form of birth control. I don't like the coil.'

He only had enough money for one, and for the life of him he couldn't remember the difference,

'Use this in both eyes, three times daily.'

Chameleon 'Hide and Seek'...

'I'm not going out looking like this - I need a new skin.'

'Oh, nuts! I locked the keys in the car!'

Mum, remember you said I could have a pet...

'Be careful opening this...it's marked dangerous goods.'

Snake Blogging

'I was hoping you could recommend a good chiropractor.'

A snake bites his lip - 'I hope I'm not poisonous, I just bit my lip!'

Art Gecko.

'Strangest turtle I ever saw!'

For the last time, Mr. Clooney - That's not what we do here.

Snake leaving Bowling Alley.

'Whats your poison.'

"Dude, you're supposed to break the whole egg off not just stick your legs out."

"Now then, were you driven out of Ireland by religious, political or economic pressures?"

Iguana in zoo licking someones ice cream.

The Komodo dragon(fig 1),is often mistaken for the Quasimodo dragon(fig 2).

Snake funerals.