Report Card Rebels Pillows

'The grades aren't MY fault - I think Mrs. Pomeroy is teaching-disabled.'

"If it's any consolation, Alex, it's the first 'G' I've ever given."

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"I got all Z's because I fell asleep in class."

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

'Let's put it this way Tommy, if we could go below F minus you would be forging new territory!'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'And it's not just me...Ms. Anthrope doesn't seem to like anyone.'

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

"That's right, Robert. Santa sends us a copy of his naughty and nice list, and we send him our students' grades."

Hell's Schlegel

Kid reading report: 'My book report is on 'TV Guide'...'

'This bottle stainless steel cleaner...if it's stainless...why would you need a cleaner?'

"The art class look - oh, you mean flung shui?"

"Yes, it's report card time again."

"In case anyone walks by and sees the bottle you ordered, we offer a sticker saying your first bottle was rated 98."

'You had me at 'warning'.'

"I think I'll just leave a hate tip."

"Stop fact checking my story."

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

Cluster Catastrophe

"I heard someone was looking for a dungeon master."

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

Wrong shelf.

Warning! Magazines Stay in Waiting Room

"As an artist, it's my job to capture the beauty and triumphs of everyday life."

"My teacher forgot to congratulate me on my great math grade. She was too busy calling Ripley's Believe It Or Not."

"It's been redacted for security reasons."

'You're not achieving the bench marks.'

Never wear running shoes with a jogging suit.

Ace Apartments: Absolutely NO beekeeping!