Repair Professional Gifts

Master Plumber

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

Fixing the TV.

Computer operator welding machine.

Tech support...can I help you!

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

Demonic Repossession.

'Your plasma screen TV needs a transfusion.'

"Frosty the Repairman"

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

"Yes, we do fix phones. But, what is that?"

"Okay, lady, your new carpet is installed...you can let your dog back in now."

A plumber preparing to go under a house's dark crawl space sees many eyes looking back from the darkness.

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"Was it a fuse?"

'I'm OK, but the car is in 'intensive care'!'

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

'And if it ain't baroque, don't fix it.'

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

'As a kid I was always taking things apart...so, anyway, that's when my parents stopped getting me pets.'

"Here’s your problem. This isn’t a ‘Franklin’ stove, it’s a ‘Voltaire.’"

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

"You're late."

"Bear with us, will you? -- We're having technical difficulties over here."