Reluctant Riser Pillows

A man filling up his coffee pot, with his brain as a coffee filter.

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'You know Doug just isn't a morning person. This afternoon's not looking too good, either.'

'yes, up every day at dawn, but there was a shameful time as a teenager when I used to sleep in until noon sometimes...'

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

A woman is sat in bed and retreats further under the duvet during the week days.

"I won't be in the office today, my apathy is acting up again."

'God, I hate Sunday mornings.'

'I set the alarm to 96 years!'

"Baldo, time to get up! It's the first day of school!"

"On days when I need to get out of bed and go to work, I close my eyes until the feeling passes."

"It was Monday morning, he kept hitting the snooze button, and before he knew it, it had been twenty years."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

'I had a great year and I wasn't even trying.'

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

"For heaven's sake lighten up, Roger! You're supposed to be on holiday."

'Now, dear, I spent 35 years pretending to look busy. I can't just quit overnight!'

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

"Careful... if you look too comfortable they take your chair away."

No you can't get out yet. You've only been in there for three hours

"I love the smell of unemployment in the morning."

"Dang it."

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

"My husband hid my laptop to stop me working on vacation."

'There's nothing on the telly!'

"You're going to the Partner's Social whether you like it or not!"

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

"Instead of cleaning my room, can we just seal the door and call it a time capsule?"

CLEAN YOUR ROOM! 'Out of sight, out of mind...'

"Sidney gets nervous if he's too far from his money."

'I do more than I want, but it's always less than I should.'

"I'm not a big fan of fresh air and sunshine, but it beats helping dad clean out the basement."

Sweeping under the carpet

Speakers on holiday.