Reluctant Farmers Gifts

"Declared Victory Garden"

baby sweetcorn...

"She wishes to range free!"

Bees SOS

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

Stork and baby discover scarecrows

Show and Tell: 'These came from our orgasmic garden.'

Cow duel.

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

A classic case of 'Cow-Worm'.

The Boys of Indian Summer

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

Australian boffins are using kangaroo stomach bacteria in cows to stop them farting methane! 'Strewth!'

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"It's dangerous to eat pangolins, but..."

No you can't get out yet. You've only been in there for three hours

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

"How to deal with weeds."

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

"Well, that backfired."

'No, officer, I'm not a homeless beggar. I'm just waiting on my wife while she's shopping.'

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'I love you guys!'

'I don't want to go school shopping! Can't you just buy stuff for me?. . .Just get me more of this in the next size up!'

Stop staring at that screen saver!

Grumpy Cow

'Getting my children to get out of bed and go to school was hard - So I bought a cattle-prod...'

'I'm out of bags.'

'Look,if you're going to hang out with us, first thing you gotta' do is lose the bell.'

'Look who came back for the family reunion.'

'Here comes the pimp.'