Reluctant Farmers Pillows

"Declared Victory Garden"

baby sweetcorn...

"She wishes to range free!"

Bees SOS

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

Stork and baby discover scarecrows

Show and Tell: 'These came from our orgasmic garden.'

Cow duel.

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

The Boys of Indian Summer

A classic case of 'Cow-Worm'.

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

Australian boffins are using kangaroo stomach bacteria in cows to stop them farting methane! 'Strewth!'

"It's dangerous to eat pangolins, but..."

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

No you can't get out yet. You've only been in there for three hours

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

"How to deal with weeds."

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'Getting my children to get out of bed and go to school was hard - So I bought a cattle-prod...'

'I love you guys!'

"Well, that backfired."

'No, officer, I'm not a homeless beggar. I'm just waiting on my wife while she's shopping.'

Grumpy Cow

'I'm out of bags.'

'I don't want to go school shopping! Can't you just buy stuff for me?. . .Just get me more of this in the next size up!'

Stop staring at that screen saver!

80 years ago. Food comes farms. 40 years ago. Market. Kids today don't understand. They think food comes from the supermarket. They don't realize it comes from farms. Present day. Kids today don't understand. They think food just shows up in boxes at the door. They don't realize those boxes come from stores.

'Look,if you're going to hang out with us, first thing you gotta' do is lose the bell.'

'Look who came back for the family reunion.'