Religious Texts Pillows

"Do you have anything else by the same author?"

John Bunyan

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

Meet the Author

Holy Bible

"This wandering in the desert for forty years thing -- It IS allegorical, isn't it?"

"Holy moly!"

Pastoring for Dummies

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'Please hold your applause until I've read all ten.'

'I'm afraid, Reverend, that what the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.'

"Not sure that's the graven image of Baal we were looking for."

'You can lead a horse to water, Ezra, but you can't...?'

"Believe it or not this is the original stack of bibles that I perjured myself on."

"We only have the Bible."

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"Remember now, this is for your Birthday AND for Christmas!"

"I couldn't put in down boss. Hard hitting, straight to the point..sure to be a best seller."

'He's bringing glad-to-be-gay tidings.'

....And on the seventh day,god painted!

'I'm new here-where are all the nuns?'

Even in retirement, Moses kept his 'chops' up.

Ikea Manger

"If you used a smaller font they would all fit on one tablet."