Relationship Introspective T-Shirts

"It's not you. It's me."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Sometimes I like to come here by myself and contemplate ... or just scream about you."

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

X-ray Psychology.

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

The Map of the Human Heart

'Well I wouldn't have to fake orgasms if you didn't fake foreplay!'

'You must heal yourself.'

"I've learned something about you tonight, Alan. You say 'chowmein' when you mean 'lomein'."

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

"Is this who I am?"

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

"You'll note that the card isn't signed so my declaration of undying love isn't legally binding!"

"Why won't you cuddle?"

James decided to stay in that night.

'Funny, I thought a near-death experience would be different, somehow.'

"I feel like there's a chick in me trying to escape."

I wonder what they're moaning about right now?

The Wishing Well

'Sorry Henry, but I'm looking for something a little more permanent.'

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

"So why do you think it's so hard to let others in?"

Tunnel of like.