Relatable Struggles Gifts

Let me at him! The nerve! Open the door! Monday. Frank, it's Monday --- He must've heard the things you said about him!

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

'Great Therapy!'

"You think you're a monster because you have poor self image."

"We don't talk anymore."

Courage. Love.

"So, how are we doing with our trust issues?"

"I know you're scared, but you can do this! Remember that time I had to clean up after you and I didn't have a bag and had to use leaves?! I was so afraid, but I did it…"

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

Wanna talk about it?

When life gives you lemons...

"I did seize the day. But then it seized me right back and used some kind of jujitsu move to flip me on my ass."

"I feel I'm losing touch with the unrealistic view I have of him."

Cliche Amusement Park. This park is no fun at all --- It's too much like real life! Look, that ride is called "The Emotional Roller Coaster." Over there is "Life's Ups and Downs"! ... and "The Mood Swings"! Look! The good old "Tunnel of Love"! Finally! A ride that's just a fun escape! Out of ardor. "Out of ardor" --- More real life. (Published originally Sept. 4, 2005.)

"See how controlling he is?!"

"Cheer up, Simon. . . I'm always here for you!"

"Your mind is somewhere else." "My mind is somewhere else."

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

Well, if being married isn't grounds for divorce, I'd like to know what is"

'You do make me laugh, Ron, but a relationship can't survive on laughter alone.'

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

Happy Days are here again

"You keep everything bottled up inside."

'Whenever he feels under attack, he calls for backup.'

"She called me immature, And if that wasn't bad enough, she burst my bouncy castle."

"We never talk about anything. 'Me Tarzan, you Jane. Me Tarzan, you Jane.' That's all he ever says."

'Right, how can I help you?' 'Your wife is having it off with my husband!'

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

'The marriage counseling session didn't help -- she still claims she never saw me before in her life.'