Regifting Pillows

Things I've learned...

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Christmas Tree

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Say it with flowers

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

The wife whisperer.

'They're dog roses!'

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

"Gift"

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Santa in the Sky: Happy Holidays!

'Too pricey? Perhaps you wish to see something in macaroni and spray paint?'

Love.

CEO.

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

Tipping Pain Chart

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"Shouldn't have, you really."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"I hate it..."

Valentines Balloons

'And that,and that,and that...'

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

'Take five Harry, I'm going on ahead to scout for sales'